Finding Purpose in Your Career: How It Evolves Across Your Life
We often think of career purpose as a single “aha” moment—like suddenly discovering the one job or path that will make life meaningful. The truth is, purpose isn’t a moment; it’s a journey. It develops over years, shaped by who you are, what energizes you, and how you want to impact the world. Understanding how purpose evolves from your teens to late adulthood can help you navigate your career and life with more clarity, confidence, and fulfillment.
The Teenage Years: Exploration and Curiosity
Your sense of purpose often begins with curiosity, not clarity. As a teen or young adult, you may feel pulled in many directions: sports, arts, volunteering, school clubs, part-time jobs, or hobbies. Each of these experiences gives you valuable feedback about what energizes you and what drains you.
Ask yourself:
When do I feel most alive or engaged?
Which activities make me lose track of time?
Where do I naturally contribute or lead, even without recognition?
These early years are about gathering data about yourself. Don’t stress about “the perfect career.” Every experience, even the ones that feel like failures, teaches you something about your strengths, preferences, and values. Mentors—teachers, coaches, family members—can help you see patterns in your strengths and inclinations that you might not notice yourself.
Early Career: Aligning Skills and Values (Mid-20s to Early 30s)
Once you step into the workforce, purpose starts taking on direction. Now it’s not just about experimenting; it’s about aligning your skills, interests, and values with your work.
Consider:
What tasks or roles make me feel competent and energized?
Who benefits from the work I do, and how does that feel?
Which projects or opportunities align with my personal values?
This stage is about learning to focus your energy. Early career decisions often feel high-stakes, but purpose here is directional rather than perfect. You’re building skills, exploring different environments, and figuring out where you make the most meaningful impact. Small experiments—a side project, mentorship, volunteering—can reveal a lot about your natural contributions and help you refine your direction.
Mid-Life: Consolidation and Leadership (Mid-30s to 50s)
By mid-life, purpose usually deepens into identity and legacy. You know your strengths, you’ve tested what energizes you, and now it’s time to focus your energy on what matters most.
Key elements of purpose at this stage:
Purposeful impact: Leading, mentoring, or shaping systems to help others grow
Integration: Aligning your values, skills, and life priorities into coherent action
Reflection and recalibration: Assessing past choices, learning from mistakes, and adjusting your path
Boundary mastery: Saying “no” to what doesn’t fit your purpose and “yes” to high-leverage opportunities
Mid-life is often when people feel tension between stability and growth. Purpose here is about balance: pursuing meaningful work while also contributing to others, whether that’s through your team, your community, or your industry. It’s also a time when leadership and mentorship roles naturally emerge, giving you new ways to channel your purpose.
Late Life: Reflection, Mentorship, and Legacy (50s+)
In later adulthood, purpose often becomes transcendent. Work and personal ambition take a back seat to wisdom, mentorship, and leaving a lasting impact.
Questions to consider:
Who or what do I want to influence in my remaining years?
What lessons and knowledge can I pass on?
How can I focus my energy on what truly matters, rather than what is urgent?
Purpose in late life is about reflection and legacy. It’s about making sure the life you’ve lived leaves a mark, whether through mentoring the next generation, contributing to your community, or simply deepening relationships that matter most.
A Lifelong Framework for Developing Purpose
Across all stages, purpose grows through three interconnected pillars:
Self-Awareness: Understanding what energizes you, your strengths, and your core values
Impact: Recognizing how your actions affect others and the world
Actionable Alignment: Turning insights into choices, projects, and behaviors that reflect your purpose
Even small steps matter: volunteer for a project that excites you, take on a mentoring role, experiment with a side hustle, or reflect regularly on what energizes and fulfills you. Purpose isn’t found in a single career move; it’s cultivated over decades through reflection, experimentation, and intentional action.
Takeaway
Purpose is a journey, not a destination. By understanding how it evolves from adolescence through late adulthood, you can make more intentional choices in your career and life. Tracking your energy, values, and impact over time allows you to align your actions with the person you are becoming—and to create work and a life that truly feels meaningful.
Why Your Boss Feels Like a Bad Parent (And What to Do About It)
Ever notice how some bosses make you feel small, frustrated, or anxious?
You’re not imagining it.
The way leaders show up at work often mirrors patterns we experienced growing up. The bosses who trigger us most are hitting the same relational wounds that shaped us as kids. Recognizing this can give you clarity and real tools for handling it.
Understanding the types of leadership that trigger these old patterns can help you make sense of your reactions and respond in a healthier way.
Here are three common dynamics I see repeatedly in both work and family settings:
1. Controlling vs. Empowering
Some bosses micromanage, demean, or insist on compliance, leaving you feeling powerless. It’s the same feeling a child gets when a parent punishes or shames instead of guiding.
Healthy leaders empower people. They encourage growth, validate effort, and help you feel capable. When a boss is controlling, it’s not just annoying, it taps into old fears of inadequacy.
2. Selfish vs. Connected
Leaders who prioritize their own ego or status over the team create tension and resentment. It’s the same dynamic as a parent who puts their own needs first.
Healthy leaders care about the people they’re responsible for. They make decisions with empathy and look out for the well-being of the group. Feeling seen and valued makes a world of difference.
3. Authoritarian vs. Modeling
Some bosses demand respect through position alone, telling you what to do without showing how it’s done. This mirrors the parent who says one thing but doesn’t live it.
The best leaders lead by example. They model integrity, accountability, and emotional regulation. Watching someone embody their values teaches far more than any lecture ever could.
Why This Matters
When a boss triggers old wounds, it can feel personal, but it’s usually not. Understanding what’s happening gives you options:
Protect your emotional well-being
Respond strategically instead of reactively
Model the leadership or parenting you wish you’d had
Next Steps
If you find yourself frustrated or on edge at work or noticing patterns in your own parenting, there are practical tools to navigate these dynamics. Strategies for managing anger, communicating under pressure, and breaking old patterns help you respond with awareness instead of emotion.
Leadership, like parenting, is something we can learn, practice, and get better at, even when others fail to show the way.